The final goodbye

3 Things to Do Immediately after Your Loved One Dies

21 June 2016 by Monica Ruiz

The moments following a loved one's demise are full of turmoil and emotional upheaval. However, if you are tasked with the responsibility of taking charge of funeral arrangements, your work becomes that much more difficult. There are many things to think about, and you may not be in a state to consider them all, particularly following an unexpected death. Below we provide a checklist of the most important things to consider immediately following your loved one's demise.

At this point, it's important to mention that you shouldn't try to handle it all alone. Enlist the help of a close friend or family member to help; take advantage of the hands that present themselves to assist.

1. Consider organ donation

This may not be at the top of your mind, but it should be considered if a viable option. If your loved one arranged to be a donor, the organs will need to be harvested as soon as possible following death. If you're uncertain, you can check their advance healthcare directives or with their lawyer to find out if a proxy was appointed or a living will was made. The same applies to finding out whether the deceased wanted their body donated to a medical institution. If so, the hospital will let you know what you need to do. In the absence of legal documents, the next of kin can also make decisions about making the deceased an organ donor.

2. Make relevant calls

Considering individual needs, notify the closest family members and friends, and arrange for somebody to notify the other people that need to know. If there are high-risk people, e.g. someone in fragile health who cannot handle the shock well, arrange to have somebody they trust break the news gently and in person. This is a valuable opportunity not only to comfort each other, but also to share any details concerning their burial and other important immediate decisions.

3. Contact a funeral home

Bring the important family members together and have a detailed conversation about the upcoming funeral. This is especially true if there aren't any instructions detailing the deceased's last wishes. You need to consider what they wanted, what your budget allows and what can be realistically done.

Contact a funeral home and arrange to have the body transported to the morgue. The deceased may have organized and even prepaid at a specific parlour. A funeral director may come in handy with the rest of the arrangements – getting the legal documents, deciding a burial location and method, and other small details. You'll need to choose a casket later, decide between cremated or embalmed, where the ashes will be stored/scattered. There are also special arrangements to consider e.g. if the deceased is a veteran.

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